Tuesday, 18 July 2017

Life So Far #2

Need to know. Need to know now so I know what to do next..

Hope everyone is well. It's the ill season - well at least in my area it is. Basically everyone around me is sick. And I sure do hope I can last until everyone is back in shape. Been a while since I last blogged so ta-da!

So right now I'm just waiting for my application's results to come out. I really really want to know my results (like right now) because only after I can decide what to do next. Do I actually have to find a job (because this has been going on for far too long) or do I apply into a private university (which is going to be bloody expensive, I don't even know how)?

Life has been pretty chilled and smooth but I'm twenty-five and I'm just here. Just like this. To be fair, there wasn't much I could do. There isn't much I can do. I'm not going to complain because it just sounds so pathetic. So yeah, you know what I mean.

I just want to start with something and in the end being able to have enough money to settle down. These results that I'm waiting for are going to determine my next move. It's just time you know. I know I can do so much more which is probably why I get frustrated sometimes. There are just things that are out of my control.

But I'm so thankful that my parents are being supportive of me. Well there isn't much to be supportive about with what I'm doing now to be honest but they don't pester me like why aren't you doing this or why can't you do this etc. Even if they do, it wouldn't make sense because they understand the situation and really, there's nothing I could've done to change it. They would just ask me to help with other things and I'll just help around the house (because I'm a restless one).

My boyfriend keeps reminding me about my worth. Times when I feel like nothing was or will work out for me, he'd pick me back up again. He probably doesn't realize how much he has given me. And it doesn't matter how much I try to give back to him, I always feel like it's not enough. Sometimes I really can't help him when he needs it and I feel sad. But when I can, I'd get out of my way to help him. I'm really lucky to have him by my side.

Other than that, I have two receptions to attend to this weekend. One on Saturday, the other one on Sunday. I'm going to be so beat after everything is over.

(Oh God, I'm really twenty-five huh?)

Ayu