Saturday, 20 February 2016

Being Present

Often I see people spending a lot of time on their phones (especially), instead of spending it with the people around them. Before you say anything, yes, I used to be one of these people. I realized it and I didn't want it to become a regularity in my everyday life. It's sad, to be honest.

But let's be real, we all need our phones. We do everything there - calling the babysitter, taking cake orders, setting a date for a site meeting etc. The list goes on. But I think that's when you try to divide your time wisely - when you actually need to make these calls and when you actually spend time with your loved ones.

I have no better example than how I spend my time with my boyfriend. As I've mentioned about it in previous posts, Allan and I are in a long distance relationship. It's never easy but we try our best. Anyway, I'd say one year into the relationship or so, I always try to take as many photos as I can when he's in town. It's nice, looking back at all those photos I've taken with him. I don't take too many pictures at once. Only a few of us together and that's it. And let me tell you this, most of the time it's a picture taken in the car because we don't like taking photos in public. So after a couple of shots, that's it. I'd keep my camera back into my bag.

But this holiday, I didn't take many pictures with him. Which (honestly) makes me feel kind of sad that I didn't capture a lot of moments. And then I give it a few seconds to sink in and you know what? Mhm, I am actually glad that I didn't. Not saying I'm glad I didn't take pictures but more like, I'm glad I spent those 2 - 3 minutes talking to him - actually having a conversation with him instead of taking photos. I could be laughing my arse off from watching his silly dance moves or I could be feeling pity from watching homeless people on the streets. All these feelings I've been feeling lately have felt so heavy and satisfying and overwhelming and scary. It's crazy.

I may not have a picture with my boyfriend everyday, every week or every month. But hey, there are always birthdays, anniversaries, weddings, Christmas etc. Special occasions when you actually want to keep the memories in an album for your future children to look at and say "Oh look! Mommy actually wore pink!" (Because I'm always wearing black). But yeah, there are special occasions. And I am always so grateful, each second I get to spend with him.

This holiday, I have felt a lot more. So deep it's actually scary. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Be present. Cut off some picture time. And oh, just a friendly reminder. You don't have to showcase every picture you've taken to the whole world. Keep some (or even all) to yourself. Make it private - only for your eyes to see and smile at when remembering the moment. Best thing about it? Only you know and it's yours.

Love you guys. Do share some of your stories and what you think about being present. I would love to read from different perspectives.

Hugs, Ayu

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